Good Bye Wilford Hall!!!

Today is Tyler's last day as a surgery intern! Hooray!!!!! I am so proud of all your hard work this last year and insanely happy that we will have tons more of you this next year!

Expiration Date June 30

One year ago today we bought our family zoo pass to the San Antonio Zoo. My how the time has flown! So we had to get one last outing to the zoo in before our move to Colorado next week. I brought our camera but not the not the good one...I figured some pictures are better than no pictures!





Afterwards I was interviewed by the news station about my opinion on the San Antonio Zoo and Sea Worlds cleanliness since they passed the Health Departments inspection with flying colors...."I'm happy!?" what were they expecting me to say? I didn't say much since it's kind of a skewed question and also because I didn't want to miss the train that Ashton had been dying to ride one last time. Too cute!!!

Toy Story 3

Tyler came home early a day last week and so we decided to take the kids to see Toy Story 3. It was a first real experience at the theater with the kids and Ashton was sooooo excited. In fact he was so into the movie that he didn't want any of the snack I had brought or the popcorn that Tyler bought! Isaac on the other hand was in heaven with all the food!

We had such a good time and the movie was soooo good that I believe that we will be going back soon!

Operation Swimming: Resumed

After Ashton's surgery, he was unable to go swimming until all his 87 stitches disolved from his delicate scalp. (Sunscreen before then was obviously a NO and you don't want to soak a healing incision especially since we want a better looking scar this time around). This was a four week time frame and for those of you who don't know, the kid LOVES water...In fact when swimming outdoors is unavailable to us in the winter we do often do multiple baths a day.

Monday was the four week mark for us and we celebrated by going to the San Antonio Zoo. While it's not my favorite zoo ever (St. Louis Zoo, why are you soooo amazing???) it does have a fun man-made beach area for kids to play in the sand and cool off. And what can I say, the kids had a blast!!! Hooray for Ashton! The celebration continued when Ashton's friend Kate invited us to a pool party on Tuesday. We took a breather from swimming on Wednesday but Thursday we set up our own kiddy pool out back and then again Friday we were back at the pool with our friends Natalie and her kids Luke and Sammy. FUN, FUN, FUN!!!

News

Yesterday we got our long awaited orders. I'm not even sure if I have written about this but once again Tyler didn't match for residency. This time around (and I think he is sticking to it) he applied for Radiology but in the Air Force it is extremely competitive. And unfortunately what makes you competitive is how much time you have in the Air Force, not how qualified you are....So when you don't match into a residency you are place into Flight Surgery, also called Flight Medicine. This is simply being a Family Physician to Air Force pilots and their families. So that is what we are doing, and now for the where....Colorado Springs! Because we got orders so late we were unable to get the Air Force to move us in time for us to be in Colorado for my brother's wedding July 15th....The wedding isn't really in Colorado either, it's in California, Tyler and I are just flying there from Colorado while his parents watch the kids....In any case we are REALLY excited to just get there. We have both our parents, lots of siblings, cousins, nephews and a niece, etc....And we are ready to spend some time doing some REAL camping!!!

empathy

We had to go to the Doctor's office yesterday morning. Nothing big, just to get some paper work signed for Ashton. Without it we cannot get orders and well, most of you know that we are moving in a month so to not even have orders yet is ridiculous. But that is another story for another day.

After a very speedy visit I decided to head over to the immunizations clinic to get Isaac caught up on his 18 month shots. Ashton was NOT happy. He HATES POKES. I reassured him that HE was not going to get ANY pokes. It was Isaac's turn today. Well, the memories of getting stuck were all to fresh in his mind and as I held Isaac down for his shots Ashton started pleading to the nurse "Don't poke my brother, not my brother!!!" The shots were delivered anyways and that's when the screams and tears let loose on both parties. One because he felt the pain and the other because he remembered the pain and did not want his brother to have to endure it. The love was SOOOO real that I had to fight the tears myself. I love you boys!!!

Surgery

Ashton had his long awaited scar revision and cranioplasty last week. The surgery was originally scheduled to be a tissue expander placement (which would allow the skin to stretch over the course of 3 weeks by fluid injections into the expander). We opted to do this surgery because as you can see by the picture below taken just a few days before the surgery, he had a big fat scar on his head that we wanted to get revised. The stretching of the skin would allow the surgeons to revise that scar during a cranioplasty (fixing the skull in this case with metal rods and plastic to fill large holes in Ashton's skull that were a result of his craniectomy when he was just a day old.)
With Tyler on nights, I went to the surgery alone with Ashton. Almost an hour into the procedure the surgeon came out...My heart DROPPED! She reassured me immediately that nothing was wrong, that on the contrary, after shaving Ashton's head and manipulating the skin with her partners it was decided that they could forgo the tissue expander. There was enough skin to do the revision and they wanted consent to proceed with the cranioplasty. I was NOT ready for that! I was prepared for a simple surgery. I was prepared to have Ashton back in my arms in an hour and back at home the following day. I was not prepared for a MAJOR surgery! Especially when the recovery time IN the hospital was 4-5 days if all went well with Tyler working nights. What about Isaac? Well, in all reality how could I deny Ashton this option? One less surgery? No needed fluid injections (That were described to me by the surgeon as feeling like braces being tightened every other day!) The whole lead up to the surgery was awful!!! He hated even taking his shirt off (new Toy Story Birthday shirt). Thankfully they didn't start an IV until after he was under. He's a hard stick. No kidding after surgery he had at least 6 missed IV sights :( Well, my anxiety was calmed after I cried for at least 30 minutes. I called my mom and OF COURSE she dropped everything on her schedule for the week and found a flight to San Antonio that night. The surgery lasted almost 4 hours and then I was able to hold my little boy and be reassured that everything went really well. Dr. Mancuso was wonderful too. She gave me the biggest hug after the surgery and talked about how well it went.

Ashton slept for almost an entire day. When he did wake up it was for short periods of time and he was SOOOO lovey! It was great! And miraculously he NEVER once complained of pain, even to this day that his head hurts. Here he is in the PICU the morning after the surgery. He doesn't even look very swollen!!!


Later that evening we transferred to the floor. This meant that he could see his brother again! He was so happy to see mom, dad, Isaac and Nana. Can you believe how happy he looks?

Ashton LOVED the activities there were in the hospital. We were across from the largest playroom in the hospital. He felt so good that we were there morning, afternoon, and night. We even played BINGO and won a prize. He felt sooo good that he didn't even want to stay in his room for a movie. Below is the morning we were discharged. They took the bandage off and he looked GOOD!!!

Seriously this kid looks GOOD bald! What a cutie!

Check out the scar...So small and close to the head!!! I am soooo excited for him~

The beloved NANA!!! Mom, thank you so much for dropping everything. It feels so good to know that my wonderful friend and mother will do anything for me whenever I need it! My kids were in such good hands and my house looked wonderful after you left!!! I hope that I will be the kind of mother you are to me.

See how happy they are!!!

So here we are 8 days out and things are looking good. The wound overall looks great, Ashton is extremely cautious with his head, although he still has had mishaps bonking his head on the car, wall, brother's head, etc. But we are optimistic that this it. And so is he. In fact when I mentioned to Ashton that he needed to rest after the surgery to help his head get better he mater-of-fact-ly stated, "but mom, I'm fine, member Dad gave me a blessing!!!" We are more than ready to finish this chapter and move onto the normalcy of childhood for this little guy. I LOVE YOU ASHTON!!! You are one brave, strong, faithful boy.

Happy Three!!!

Ashton turned 3 today! My little baby has grown so much!!! So much that he cannot be called a baby, although he will always be my baby, my first baby! So here is the birthday boy on his special day...He started the day with a present from papa and Nana Rust.

Then his present from Mom and Dad. He quite liked his Big Wheel. It took him a while to get the hang of it but he sure enjoys it. The only problem, like all our toys, is that there is only one.

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Here is little Izey after finishing his turn on Ashton's bike.

Then we had a little birthday party with his friends Alijah, Kate and Kimberli. He was pretty sad that his friend Eli couldn't make it. But the kids loves a party and he sure had fun. He just gets soooo excited when his friends arrive and that excitement remains the entire time: games, pinata, cake and presents. He LOVES every minute of it. (I have to confess that he had two parties this year, one in Colorado with family...don't have any pictures of that one yet and then in San Antonio). So here are some pictures of his special day...

The Pinata!!! Boy do kids ever LOVE pinatas!!!

LOVE IT!!!!

18 month stud

Isaac Isaac Isaac. Or shall I say Izey Bizey..How is it that you are 18 months old all ready? I simply must take some time and write all about you, the things you say, the things you love and of course the the things you do...Here's to you baby!

Your vocabulary is beginning to sky rocket. You've discovered that you can talk in phrases to more fully communicate and it's often more effective. This morning you handed Dad some candy and said "open please". "What's that" "uh oh" "NO, you!" and the simple words like "mom" "dad", "bubow" (bubble), dog, "ba" (bath), "ju" (juice), "HOT", "milk", "cheese", "don't", "eyes", "air" (hair), "atuh" (ashton), papa, andoo (andrew). You are even getting good at single the alphabet, well, tune mostly, with Ashton and I. And while still sign a few words like more, all done, and your own special "I want to eat that NOW" which is done by gaping your mouth open as wide as wide can be and then just stare at the what it is you so badly want. ADORABLE!!! You understand more than I thought possible for a 18 month old. You're good at following directions like, put the toys in the box, put your plate in the sink, give this xyz to Ashton who is in the other room, etc. You just know what is going on!

As far as your loves go I would say that you are a very passionate person. Your number one love other than your family is your little monkey "Boo". He is your side kick. You've taken to him just like your brother, but unlike your brother you love all stuffed animals. You LOVE trucks and cars and making crashing sounds. You love balls, you love bubbles, you love dancing. You love junk food particularly chocolate, pudding, candy, cake, and pancakes. You LOVE raspberries, blueberries, granola bars, carrots and broccoli. You love trains, running, hitting (playfull of course), trees, ballons, water, and killing ants, panting, and well, doing whatever Ashton is doing. You have learned so much about life just by doing what he does!

I love the way you sqeeze your eyes shut when you say cheese. I love the way you love to eat, no matter how messy you are! I love the way you hold up your shirt over your belly. I love how ticklish you are and your great big chuckle. I love the way you love animals. I love the way you love your brother! I love the goofy things you do to make us laugh. I love how you wrap your arms so tight around my neck and hold me for long periods of time. I love how you love read books after you wake up. I love the way you sing along to songs. I love being your mom and knowing you love me too!

Letting Go

With Ashton's first surgery coming up at the end of the month, I worried about what to do with little Isaac while I am with Ashton at the hospital. My mom with be here in June for the big surgery, so no worries there. What's difficult about it is Tyler is on nights. This means the inability to take a "day" off other than what is on the schedule...It really became difficult when the intern who covers for him on his off days would be on vacation the week of the surgery...ughhh..So Tyler tried to work it out with a few of the other iterns to get cebvbb rtain nights off and it was near IMPOSSIBLE!!!! We felt extremely frustrated when even the resident in charge of the schedule was not accomodating to our needs. It truth I wanted to make those hurt they way that I felt hurt. I wanted to write a letter to the wife of the intern who so heartlessly refused to switch Tyler his nights off simply because he did not want to hold an extra pager the next day. In that letter I wanted to say something like, " I hope that your child never has a critical surgery because it is terrifying and if one day they do I hope that your husband is able to work out his schedule with his co-workers so that he is able to be off for that surgery". Terrible, I know. I had no charity, only pain. It was eating at me, I was hurting myself. Then I decided enough was enough. I could let the actions of others influence me for good or for evil and I was choosing the later. So I decided to let go. I decided to pray for that family, that their family needs would be meant and that I could love them and serve them. It worked, it was hard at first but when I committed it was incredibly easy and I could feel my self-inflicted wound heal. All I can say is I am grateful for the gospel, grateful for what I have learned, grateful for my faith in Jesus Christ and for the power of the atonement. Grateful that I have won this little spat within myself!